NOTES TO MYSELF

Friday, April 15, 2005

Always triggered around this issue

Without fail, when I hear the words from my supervisors about how "It is uncomfortable to say VSKJDHFKSYUIER (You fill in the blank), but this is our job. A therapist has to know how to say kjshekrusyeruyi" when I talk about my feelings around confronting a challenging issue with clients, I am so pissed off inside that I want to yell or throw something.

AND THIS HAPPENS ALMOST EVERY SUPERVISION.

Fuck it; of course I know it's my job to confront clients on difficult issues that are hard to name. That's why I raise these questions and ask for guidance at supervision. So, please, answer my fucking questions and back up your answers so I can learn from you. I don't need you to tell me that it's a hard job. I KNOW. I am fucking living and breathing it, okay?

I am so pissed off. I already need help, and I ask for it, and I don't get a straight answer but I do get people harping on how important it is that I do my job. Fucking ridiculous.

Worst supervision ever. This one tops them all.

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